My Brother's Keeper
by HaarFager
Summary: There are so many fictional detectives that people have created and they make them from older and older times past. I figure you can't get any older detective than from the first people in the Bible - Adam and Eve. This is my entry for the oldest private eye ever created. He's from the hardboiled school as well.


My Brother's Keeper

by Kenneth Dwain Harrelson

It was a dark and stormy night in the Garden. The rain fell down in waterfalls. So much rain that the 40 foot Chris Craft I had my eyes on suddenly began to seem a little too small. But, that's another story. My name's Adam. I'm a Private Investigator. That's P.I. with a capital on eye. I was sitting behind my desk waiting for my first case to come in. See, I had just hung up my shingle and this was my first day in business. I was to find out that it wouldn't be long before business was to come my way. And, along with it, trouble with a capital T.

Then, _she_ walked in my office. Her name was Eve. Yes, _that_ Eve. She came strolling into my presence as if she owned the Garden. Well, maybe she did have deed to at least half of it. She was my woman and I was her man. I watched her as she perambulated slowly toward my desk, where I sat behind it, watching her every nuance. When she reached the front of it, I motioned for her to sit down in one of the two client's chairs I kept there. She looked at the one to her left, adjusted her fig leaf, and sat down. I waited for her to speak first. I had seen it in an old movie once and it had worked for Bogie.

"I seem to require your services." She was hesitant, nervous.

I licked my lips and replied casually, "Yeah, what's it about?"

She looked around the room with quick little glances and I knew she was wondering if there were any other people around before she told me her story. I put her at ease. "Go ahead and spill it, sister. We're all alone here."

That seemed to loosen her up.

"All right. I think I can trust you."

I winked at her. "Sure you can. Who else can you trust?"

"Well, I guess nobody."

"See? Half of your dilemma is solved already. Won't you tell me your story and start at the beginning. I've found that's always the best place to start."

She smoothed the fig leaf underneath her and began.

"Apparently, you have a rib missing..."

"Not that far back, sister. Only to where your problem begins."

"Oh, okay." I nodded for her to continue. She did, but reluctantly. I wondered if it was because she had something to hide? Well, I'd find that out soon enough. "My son is missing. Can you find him?"

"I don't know. What's his name and what does he look like?"

"He's a good boy. He's never done anything wrong."

"I'm sure he is, Ma'am, but, please, just answer my questions."

"His name is Able, he's got brown hair and stands about 5 feet 8 inches high and I haven't seen him since yesterday."

"Have you asked Cain if he's seen him?"

"No, I didn't think to do that. I..." And then she broke down. I could tell I wouldn't get much more out of her in this condition. So, I'd soothe her the best way I could and look into it with what little she had given me to go on.

"Look, everything is gonna be all right. Trust me on this. I'll go see this Cain fellow and see what he knows. Maybe he can clear up your little mystery."

She looked up to me, wiping a stray tear that had slid down the bridge of her nose. The fig leaf she was wearing around her chest was bright with moisture from her having cried so much already. I tried not to focus on that area and, instead, looked right into her eyes. Those burning, intense eyes of hers. They were two dark pools that seemed to be able to see into next Tuesday. I knew I would do anything for her at that moment. Anything I could to make her happy. I've always been a sucker for dames who wore organically-enhanced clothing.

"Are you sure?" she asked finally.

"Yes. Just don't you worry your little heart about it. I'll get to the bottom of this mystery." I stood up and came around the edge of the desk to where she was seated. She got up and faced me.

"How can I ever thank you?"

"My bill will be in the mail."

I spun her around and directed her out of my office. I had to get cracking if I was going to get the lowdown on this case.

I had seen this guy named Cain several times, mostly over by the area where the squash, watermelons and rutabagas were harvested. I'd always assumed he was a farmer. I don't know where I got that idea, but I'd play up that angle when I questioned him. I put on my hat and the long fig leaf trench coat I always wear and went out to look this fellow up. He wasn't hard to find.

When I came up on him, he was stacking a bunch of fruits and vegetables in a pile. He had a match in his left hand and what appeared to be a container of charcoal lighter fluid in the other. This guy was about to roast something, I thought. Uh, huh. Barbecue, my favorite. He heard me coming and spun around, lowering both hands into a defensive posture.

"What do you want?" he hissed from between clinched teeth in an accusing manner.

I had to take the offensive because I knew certain facts before I even got here. I don't know if he was aware of it or not, but, other than my client and myself, he was the only one of the two other people that lived in this Garden. That little fact burned a hole in my brain as I prepared to ask him my first question. I wasn't going to take it easy with him, either. I didn't know but that he could turn on me in a second's notice and become violent.

"All right, it's time to come clean." I looked at his fruit pile with a menacing glare.

"What do you mean?" he asked, noticing where my gaze fell.

"Where is your kid brother Able? What did you do to him?"

"I... I don't know what you mean." I could tell he was hiding something from me in his evasive manner. But, what? And was it pertinent to the case?

"I know he was last seen with you. So, you'd better come clean and tell me your story. I could make it very rough for you if you don't."

"I don't know what you're talking about. Am I supposed to be my brother's keeper?"

"No," I pointed my finger right at him and played a hunch, "but you _do_ happen to be your brother's killer!"

He collapsed right there in front of me. I knew he wouldn't rabbit on me because I had him right where I wanted him. And he knew it, too.

"How... how did you find out? How did you know?"

"I'm a private eye, I've got my methods. And what you've done is pretty serious. Although you've given me my first case, you're still gonna have to pay the price for what you've done."

"What's that?"

"I'll just say, let the punishment fit the crime."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm gonna scar you so that anybody that sees you will know you for what you really are. A murderer!"

"When _who_ see's me? There _isn't_ anybody else. We're the only ones there are so far."

I could see he had me on a small technicality. But, that still didn't lessen the severity of his crime.

"Nevertheless, I'm going to have to do this." I pulled out my pocketknife and cut him with a quick motion along his right cheek. You couldn't help but notice a thing like that. It stood out like the proverbial sore thumb.

"Ouch!" he said. "That hurt."

"Sorry, but let that be a lesson to you."

He lowered his head, turned away and the last I saw of him, he was heading north, over in the direction of Sumeria. I never saw him again, but I know that until the day he died, he would always remember me. I folded up my knife, replaced it in my jacket pocket and went back to the office. I remember Eve telling me something about an apple crumb cake she was making for dessert tonight. I thought that sounded quite tempting.

The End


End file.
